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How to be Become Great with Women |
15th February 2008, 06:33 |
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There are men that will never be successful with women.
Sounds crazy, but it's true.
In fact a lot of these men just won't be there.
Being not smart enough or somehow having defective is not the mere reason. It is actually on a subconscious choice, that they have made without knowing.
Now how can you make sure that you are not one of these guys.
Well I'm here to tell you how. What I am about to share with you is a thing that you might not be heard from other gurus because it's such a very subtle but very powerful fix that most leave it out of the equation.
Let me tell you a guy named Matt. He's a good guy who likes socialize and has taken a bootcamp with another pickup company. But he still doesn't get the success he's longing for; in fact he's not successful at all.
You might ask why I don't help him.
Aside from being too set in his ways and is stubborn. The real reason why I can't help him is the same reason why he isn't successful with women.
As I said Matt's a good guy, but every time we had a conversation with each other I get the feeling like he wants something from me. In fact a lot of our common friends have said the same thing to me about him.
We don't like hanging out with Matt and neither do women.
Matt always give this vibe of having an ulterior motive. He talks to you like a friend, which is great, but he naturally gives off a vibe that says to me that he's trying to take knowledge, power and fun from me.
Same as thru when he's talking to women. He treats them in a friendly manner and is funny but always gives off this vibe that on another level he has an awaiting intention.
Having intentions with women isn't a bad thing. If you express your intentions openly they'll accept it, especially if you have tight game. It may even turn them on. IN FACT it will skyrocket your conversion rate if you do it the right way.
But if you hide your intentions and you come off as creepy and weird. Women won't trust you or feel safe being with. You could be the best actor in the world but... they will know.
Being creepy is the "Death" card in the Tarot deck of your love life. It will destroy any chance of success you might have.
So now you have an idea of what might be going wrong. How can we fix it?
Well to begin with you need to start being fun and unattached to the outcome as much as you can. This could be anything from telling a great story to a group or being a great host to a bunch of your friends. It could also be a compliment (in the right way of course) or a tease that will spike emotions in way that is fun to a woman.
Next you need to start doing is being clear about your intentions. This is not about directly telling a woman "The reason why I talk to you is so that I can get into your pants." That's going to kill your pickup about as fast as being creepy.
Be out there talking to women not only because you want to pickup, but because women are amazing and fun and interesting and wonderful.
There are small subtle changes you can make in your behavior that will affect how your intentions are perceived and if you're congruent with what you're saying. There are so many small fixes that I could write a novel on them.
Do you want to read a novel about fixing your creepy vibe and then taking the months to implement it that it will require? I didn't think so. I wouldn't want to spend the months writing that novel either. |
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Mystery's Show Aired on VH1 |
21st December 2007, 05:36 |
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I wanted to share with you guys my predictions on the recent episode of Mystery's the Pick Up Artist aired on VH1.
Here are what I liked:
1.The Students. I love pick up students in general, they're always so eager to learn, share a common interest with me, and so grateful for the even the smallest amounts of improvement they make. Students are hands down the #1 reason why I do what I do.
2.Mystery's Ridiculous Outfits. No one can peacock like mystery, hands down. And the shows budget really allows for some fancy stuff. I dig it. Peacocking that hard is actually quite a challenge. Don't believe me? Go to your local lair and look at all the guys who try it and get it wrong. It's a trainwreck.
3.The Challenges. Creative, fun and entertaining. Winner of one contest gets to walk around with a cute puppy in the next. Hillarious.
And is what I didn't liked:
1.Mystery not knowing why some of his students fail... He's so attached to his structured method, he literally has blind spots as to why his students get blown out... "Yeah he should have used a false time constraint". How about his lame body language, complete lack of masculine vibe and messed up compliance ratios?
2.Using 4 year old, tired-out material, like "flossing before you brush etc.." Come on, we stopped using that stuff 3 years ago for GOOD reason! LAME, non-sensual conversation that goes NOWHERE! Sure you'll get the girl to answer your question, but that's not always what I call PROGRESS. If you're going to have the guys memorizing routines, why not make them powerful, masculine and effective?
3.J-Dog's hair. I don't think I need to go into this. Looks like the poor dude passed out on a park bench in the middle of a graffiti contest. While there were certainly things about this show that bug the working pick up artist in me, I have to hand it to Mystery and VH1 for presenting the community in a good light to a mainstream audience.
Now here's my predictions to the four dudes:
Alvaro: This guy COULD become a master pua, but not in a few weeks, and not under Mystery's tuleage. He's got that "inner flame" that drives him to excel at different things, but he's going to need to really work to get consistent, and kill his approach anxiety and fear. He's still got the brakes on. The minute he gets past that, his game will explode.
Joe: I think this guy has got serious potential on the show. He's got the attitude down, but he's the type that will get a certain level of success and become complacent. He'll get a girlfriend and develop his social circle and work off that. Not TRUE master pua material. I just don't see the kind of passion/drive that would carry him to Master PUAdom. He may do well on the show, however, just due to the lack of competition.
Brady: Tall, good looking, fast learner. He's chill, makes steady progress. His use of corny material, and constant second guessing of himself is what's holding himself back. If he just chills out and acts NORMAL he'll be on fire. Again though, like joe, will probably become complacent at a certain level.
Pradeep: Could become a master pua, but he's gotta seriously increase his sensuality. He's in the friend zone still. Doesn't matter if he got that chick's number on the show because that was FRIENDLY number close. He's interesting but... too interesting. It's giving the woman something to be attracted to, but those things are too exterior to get that deep physical attraction that a pua needs to do fast pulls, sensual selection switching, multiple relationship stuff, etc...
In conclusion, it was a super entertaining show and I'll try to catch another episode if I can. |
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How to Attract the Woman Before you Pick-Up |
18th December 2007, 05:59 |
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There are guys that the first thing they do when they meet a woman is show her that they understand GAME. They'll start talking about evolution, alpha males, how girls will always cheat on their boyfriends, how they know girls like intimacy more than guys etc.
Starting right now, I will refer to this nonsense as "The Talk of Death".
As what I have learn in pick-up generally this things make very poor conversation topics with women. Especially hot ones.
Let me tell you why, and also I'll give you a very counter-intuitive idea of what to do instead.
This thing might work with the social anthropologist grad student, but not to a woman that any man in his right mind would be attracted to.
(Oh BTW - if you do happen to run into a girl that loves this kind of stuff, by all means talk about it, I'm just saying it should not be used as an ATTRACTION strategy for most of the female population)
There are a few major things wrong with this technique:
1. It puts a woman on the defensive. It's like one country revealing it's battle plans to another country that it is at war with.
It shows that you are "thinking too much" about the dynamic, which not only is a huge turn off, but also makes her think you're going to be a mind-trip. Not good.
2. Chances are, her awareness level is about 10% of yours.
Especially if you're keeping up on my newsletters of the concept called "Stepped Awareness".
Have you ever tried played a song you loved for a friend and they just didn't get it?
It's because their awareness didn't go through the same process that yours had - and resulted in you really liking the song...
To a woman who spends the majority of her time thinking about new clothes, celebrities and her problems with her boss, your talk about "the unique mating patters of the bonobo apes and how it relates to girls in the club" is just too alien and weird for her.
This is the same reason why you'll sometimes see the biggest AFC ever with a smoking hot girl. He's normal, and she can easily introduce him to her friends without being ashame!
3. To a woman that DOES understand it; what you're talking about might be seems like a big deal, when it should be plainly obvious.
5-10% of women actually DO get this stuff. It's obvious, intuitive and accepted for them.
These women tend to also like women, capable of open relationships, and generally a lot of fun.
But here's the thing - the guys they end up dating ALSO get this stuff intuitively.
And when you get something intuitively, you'll never gonna go out of your way to convince another person of it, or explain like it's some huge revelation!
So the moment you do it, the women who are most eligible for the lifestyle you're looking for, will instantly disqualify you.
So... What to do instead?
Here's one of the most powerful techniques I use is this:
Understand society's programming,
Understand her specific programming, and;
Appear to be under the exact same programming.
Once you get to know how to use it, you'll surely see the big improvement in your game
Keep your knowledge of REALITY to yourself (and of course, if you figure out anything amazing, I would appreciate it if you share it on my forum as well) |
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How to Attract the Woman Before you Pick-Up |
18th December 2007, 05:58 |
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There are guys that the first thing they do when they meet a woman is show her that they understand GAME. They'll start talking about evolution, alpha males, how girls will always cheat on their boyfriends, how they know girls like intimacy more than guys etc.
Starting right now, I will refer to this nonsense as "The Talk of Death".
As what I have learn in pick-up generally this things make very poor conversation topics with women. Especially hot ones.
Let me tell you why, and also I'll give you a very counter-intuitive idea of what to do instead.
This thing might work with the social anthropologist grad student, but not to a woman that any man in his right mind would be attracted to.
(Oh BTW - if you do happen to run into a girl that loves this kind of stuff, by all means talk about it, I'm just saying it should not be used as an ATTRACTION strategy for most of the female population)
There are a few major things wrong with this technique:
1. It puts a woman on the defensive. It's like one country revealing it's battle plans to another country that it is at war with.
It shows that you are "thinking too much" about the dynamic, which not only is a huge turn off, but also makes her think you're going to be a mind-trip. Not good.
2. Chances are, her awareness level is about 10% of yours.
Especially if you're keeping up on my newsletters of the concept called "Stepped Awareness".
Have you ever tried played a song you loved for a friend and they just didn't get it?
It's because their awareness didn't go through the same process that yours had - and resulted in you really liking the song...
To a woman who spends the majority of her time thinking about new clothes, celebrities and her problems with her boss, your talk about "the unique mating patters of the bonobo apes and how it relates to girls in the club" is just too alien and weird for her.
This is the same reason why you'll sometimes see the biggest AFC ever with a smoking hot girl. He's normal, and she can easily introduce him to her friends without being ashame!
3. To a woman that DOES understand it; what you're talking about might be seems like a big deal, when it should be plainly obvious.
5-10% of women actually DO get this stuff. It's obvious, intuitive and accepted for them.
These women tend to also like women, capable of open relationships, and generally a lot of fun.
But here's the thing - the guys they end up dating ALSO get this stuff intuitively.
And when you get something intuitively, you'll never gonna go out of your way to convince another person of it, or explain like it's some huge revelation!
So the moment you do it, the women who are most eligible for the lifestyle you're looking for, will instantly disqualify you.
So... What to do instead?
Here's one of the most powerful techniques I use is this:
Understand society's programming,
Understand her specific programming, and;
Appear to be under the exact same programming.
Once you get to know how to use it, you'll surely see the big improvement in your game
Keep your knowledge of REALITY to yourself (and of course, if you figure out anything amazing, I would appreciate it if you share it on my forum as well) |
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Permalink | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks | Post Comment |
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Creating of Sexual Tension to Attract and Arouse a Woman |
5th December 2007, 06:32 |
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This is now the second newsletter.
In my first newsletter we tackle about credibility. And as I said able to create credibility is one of the main components in sleeping with a girl quickly.
Now we will study the other component which is about “Sexual Tension”.
Sexual tension is important in any interaction with a woman. It brings energy or recharge the interaction. It has a subtle application but powerful effect especially if you want to sleep with the girl quickly.
There are a lot of concepts of sexual tension that are floating in the seduction community nowadays.
Some examples of these are cocky bantering and flirting, explicit sexual interest paired with false barriers, using the word “sexy” to convey a sexual intention, and of course the old Speed Seduction route – complex language patterns intended to implant sexual thoughts in a woman’s mind.
Some of these techniques are better than others, and can definitely improve the quality and success of your pickups.
I prefer a very pure definition of sexual tension because it is grounded in real sexual desire, and a very natural way of magnifying the tension felt by the woman.
Sexual tension is the presence of a controlled arousal state, in the absence of overt sexual interest.
In the right time, I create sexual tension by focusing my sexual desire on my woman, but not making any overt sexual advances. I maintain intrigue, a sense of ambiguity, which keeps her focused on me, and directs her mind toward sexual thoughts. My state is transferred to her, and she is now aroused. It is then only a matter of handling logistics through leadership and compliance techniques.
There are two reasons why a sexually aroused state is so important.
First, women love sex. A sexual man is valuable to a woman because he can give her pleasure. Women are attracted to men who are attracted to women.
The second reason is more subtle. There is a phenomenon I call “state-transfer.”
State transfer may occur on a metaphysical, psychic energy level. But more so, a state is transferred with non-verbal sub communication. When you are turned on, your voice subtly (or not so subtly) reflects your state, as do your facial expressions, eye contact, manner of touching, body language, and a million other little things to numerous to try to micromanage.
Have you ever been in a bad mood, and a friend came by in a really great, excited mood?
Your mood probably changed, and you found yourself smiling and cheering up in spite of yourself.
Or how do you feel around someone when they are nervous?
You feel nervous too! Think of a time you were with a woman, say a girlfriend, and she was obviously very horny and sexually aroused, but you weren’t doing anything sexual. You probably got excited because she was excited. This is how humans hypnotize each other in every day life – we transfer our states to each other.
Can you see where this is going?
How about controlled arousal state...
It’s not as simple as just being turned on, although that’s part of it. State control is vital - if you are nervous or uncomfortable, you won’t be able to get sexually aroused. (State control is not only vital in seduction, but in life. It allows you to stay calm, generally happy, and more productive. In spiritual terms, it is sometimes called “staying centered” or having “peace of mind.”)
The best way to stay calm and comfortable in social situations is experience. Socialize more, go out (sober), get experience talking to women.
Meditation, good diet, avoidance of harmful indulgences like drug use, television, internet, and regular exercise all help.
While for the “getting turned on” part, raising your testosterone level will have an incredible effect. Natural ways to increase testosterone include heavy weight training (squats, deadlifts, bench press, etc.) zinc supplementation, eating lots of animal protein, and if possible, regular sex.
You already know how to get aroused. During your interactions with women, simply focus on what she’d look like naked, or imagine having sex with her, or whatever fun little thoughts you want to entertain.
Creating Tension
The tension component is really an extension of the second level of the Attraction Hierarchy - Intrigue. Intrigue can be described in two ways:
It can be seen as a lack of over-validating a woman, or getting her attention fixated on you by being ambiguous and holding back information.
These are flip sides of the same coin. Applied to sexual tension, we enter a sexual state, but don’t verbalize our desire.
If we did, the girl may like it or not like it, but at now she knows where she stands - she is validated.
That isn’t bad, but it’s not optimal. She has you figured out, and knows you want her, which gives her the option of forgetting about you and focusing elsewhere. You are “solved.”
Another important point in verbalizing sexual interest is that it puts the woman in a position where she has to agree to it. She must admit that this is leading to sex. Again, that’s not bad, but is not optimal, and sometimes can create a mental block in the girl's mind for getting isolated with you.
Let's take an illustration;
Imagine sitting in a room with a closed treasure chest in front of you. Then you open it and find gold coins. is the chest more interesting?
True, the gold coins are great, but there’s no longer a mystery. You can even forget about the gold coins for a while to go watch TV or call a friend, because those coins aren’t going anywhere.
But before you know what’s in there, that chest preoccupies your mind and keeps your attention.
Mastered that concept, you're going to do well on your way. |
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Permalink | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks | Post Comment |
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Creating of Sexual Tension to Attract and Arouse a Woman |
5th December 2007, 06:32 |
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This is now the second newsletter.
In my first newsletter we tackle about credibility. And as I said able to create credibility is one of the main components in sleeping with a girl quickly.
Now we will study the other component which is about “Sexual Tension”.
Sexual tension is important in any interaction with a woman. It brings energy or recharge the interaction. It has a subtle application but powerful effect especially if you want to sleep with the girl quickly.
There are a lot of concepts of sexual tension that are floating in the seduction community nowadays.
Some examples of these are cocky bantering and flirting, explicit sexual interest paired with false barriers, using the word “sexy” to convey a sexual intention, and of course the old Speed Seduction route – complex language patterns intended to implant sexual thoughts in a woman’s mind.
Some of these techniques are better than others, and can definitely improve the quality and success of your pickups.
I prefer a very pure definition of sexual tension because it is grounded in real sexual desire, and a very natural way of magnifying the tension felt by the woman.
Sexual tension is the presence of a controlled arousal state, in the absence of overt sexual interest.
In the right time, I create sexual tension by focusing my sexual desire on my woman, but not making any overt sexual advances. I maintain intrigue, a sense of ambiguity, which keeps her focused on me, and directs her mind toward sexual thoughts. My state is transferred to her, and she is now aroused. It is then only a matter of handling logistics through leadership and compliance techniques.
There are two reasons why a sexually aroused state is so important.
First, women love sex. A sexual man is valuable to a woman because he can give her pleasure. Women are attracted to men who are attracted to women.
The second reason is more subtle. There is a phenomenon I call “state-transfer.”
State transfer may occur on a metaphysical, psychic energy level. But more so, a state is transferred with non-verbal sub communication. When you are turned on, your voice subtly (or not so subtly) reflects your state, as do your facial expressions, eye contact, manner of touching, body language, and a million other little things to numerous to try to micromanage.
Have you ever been in a bad mood, and a friend came by in a really great, excited mood?
Your mood probably changed, and you found yourself smiling and cheering up in spite of yourself.
Or how do you feel around someone when they are nervous?
You feel nervous too! Think of a time you were with a woman, say a girlfriend, and she was obviously very horny and sexually aroused, but you weren’t doing anything sexual. You probably got excited because she was excited. This is how humans hypnotize each other in every day life – we transfer our states to each other.
Can you see where this is going?
How about controlled arousal state...
It’s not as simple as just being turned on, although that’s part of it. State control is vital - if you are nervous or uncomfortable, you won’t be able to get sexually aroused. (State control is not only vital in seduction, but in life. It allows you to stay calm, generally happy, and more productive. In spiritual terms, it is sometimes called “staying centered” or having “peace of mind.”)
The best way to stay calm and comfortable in social situations is experience. Socialize more, go out (sober), get experience talking to women.
Meditation, good diet, avoidance of harmful indulgences like drug use, television, internet, and regular exercise all help.
While for the “getting turned on” part, raising your testosterone level will have an incredible effect. Natural ways to increase testosterone include heavy weight training (squats, deadlifts, bench press, etc.) zinc supplementation, eating lots of animal protein, and if possible, regular sex.
You already know how to get aroused. During your interactions with women, simply focus on what she’d look like naked, or imagine having sex with her, or whatever fun little thoughts you want to entertain.
Creating Tension
The tension component is really an extension of the second level of the Attraction Hierarchy - Intrigue. Intrigue can be described in two ways:
It can be seen as a lack of over-validating a woman, or getting her attention fixated on you by being ambiguous and holding back information.
These are flip sides of the same coin. Applied to sexual tension, we enter a sexual state, but don’t verbalize our desire.
If we did, the girl may like it or not like it, but at now she knows where she stands - she is validated.
That isn’t bad, but it’s not optimal. She has you figured out, and knows you want her, which gives her the option of forgetting about you and focusing elsewhere. You are “solved.”
Another important point in verbalizing sexual interest is that it puts the woman in a position where she has to agree to it. She must admit that this is leading to sex. Again, that’s not bad, but is not optimal, and sometimes can create a mental block in the girl's mind for getting isolated with you.
Let's take an illustration;
Imagine sitting in a room with a closed treasure chest in front of you. Then you open it and find gold coins. is the chest more interesting?
True, the gold coins are great, but there’s no longer a mystery. You can even forget about the gold coins for a while to go watch TV or call a friend, because those coins aren’t going anywhere.
But before you know what’s in there, that chest preoccupies your mind and keeps your attention.
Mastered that concept, you're going to do well on your way. |
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Permalink | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks | Post Comment |
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Creating of Sexual Tension to Attract and Arouse a Woman |
5th December 2007, 06:31 |
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This is now the second newsletter.
In my first newsletter we tackle about credibility. And as I said able to create credibility is one of the main components in sleeping with a girl quickly.
Now we will study the other component which is about “Sexual Tension”.
Sexual tension is important in any interaction with a woman. It brings energy or recharge the interaction. It has a subtle application but powerful effect especially if you want to sleep with the girl quickly.
There are a lot of concepts of sexual tension that are floating in the seduction community nowadays.
Some examples of these are cocky bantering and flirting, explicit sexual interest paired with false barriers, using the word “sexy” to convey a sexual intention, and of course the old Speed Seduction route – complex language patterns intended to implant sexual thoughts in a woman’s mind.
Some of these techniques are better than others, and can definitely improve the quality and success of your pickups.
I prefer a very pure definition of sexual tension because it is grounded in real sexual desire, and a very natural way of magnifying the tension felt by the woman.
Sexual tension is the presence of a controlled arousal state, in the absence of overt sexual interest.
In the right time, I create sexual tension by focusing my sexual desire on my woman, but not making any overt sexual advances. I maintain intrigue, a sense of ambiguity, which keeps her focused on me, and directs her mind toward sexual thoughts. My state is transferred to her, and she is now aroused. It is then only a matter of handling logistics through leadership and compliance techniques.
There are two reasons why a sexually aroused state is so important.
First, women love sex. A sexual man is valuable to a woman because he can give her pleasure. Women are attracted to men who are attracted to women.
The second reason is more subtle. There is a phenomenon I call “state-transfer.”
State transfer may occur on a metaphysical, psychic energy level. But more so, a state is transferred with non-verbal sub communication. When you are turned on, your voice subtly (or not so subtly) reflects your state, as do your facial expressions, eye contact, manner of touching, body language, and a million other little things to numerous to try to micromanage.
Have you ever been in a bad mood, and a friend came by in a really great, excited mood?
Your mood probably changed, and you found yourself smiling and cheering up in spite of yourself.
Or how do you feel around someone when they are nervous?
You feel nervous too! Think of a time you were with a woman, say a girlfriend, and she was obviously very horny and sexually aroused, but you weren’t doing anything sexual. You probably got excited because she was excited. This is how humans hypnotize each other in every day life – we transfer our states to each other.
Can you see where this is going?
How about controlled arousal state...
It’s not as simple as just being turned on, although that’s part of it. State control is vital - if you are nervous or uncomfortable, you won’t be able to get sexually aroused. (State control is not only vital in seduction, but in life. It allows you to stay calm, generally happy, and more productive. In spiritual terms, it is sometimes called “staying centered” or having “peace of mind.”)
The best way to stay calm and comfortable in social situations is experience. Socialize more, go out (sober), get experience talking to women.
Meditation, good diet, avoidance of harmful indulgences like drug use, television, internet, and regular exercise all help.
While for the “getting turned on” part, raising your testosterone level will have an incredible effect. Natural ways to increase testosterone include heavy weight training (squats, deadlifts, bench press, etc.) zinc supplementation, eating lots of animal protein, and if possible, regular sex.
You already know how to get aroused. During your interactions with women, simply focus on what she’d look like naked, or imagine having sex with her, or whatever fun little thoughts you want to entertain.
Creating Tension
The tension component is really an extension of the second level of the Attraction Hierarchy - Intrigue. Intrigue can be described in two ways:
It can be seen as a lack of over-validating a woman, or getting her attention fixated on you by being ambiguous and holding back information.
These are flip sides of the same coin. Applied to sexual tension, we enter a sexual state, but don’t verbalize our desire.
If we did, the girl may like it or not like it, but at now she knows where she stands - she is validated.
That isn’t bad, but it’s not optimal. She has you figured out, and knows you want her, which gives her the option of forgetting about you and focusing elsewhere. You are “solved.”
Another important point in verbalizing sexual interest is that it puts the woman in a position where she has to agree to it. She must admit that this is leading to sex. Again, that’s not bad, but is not optimal, and sometimes can create a mental block in the girl's mind for getting isolated with you.
Let's take an illustration;
Imagine sitting in a room with a closed treasure chest in front of you. Then you open it and find gold coins. is the chest more interesting?
True, the gold coins are great, but there’s no longer a mystery. You can even forget about the gold coins for a while to go watch TV or call a friend, because those coins aren’t going anywhere.
But before you know what’s in there, that chest preoccupies your mind and keeps your attention.
Mastered that concept, you're going to do well on your way. |
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Permalink | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks | Post Comment |
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Tips and Ways to Attract a Woman |
14th November 2007, 09:13 |
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How do you attract a woman through your conversation?
How do you let her know that you are for real?
Or does she know that after she sleeps with you all of what you said will be backed up?
All three of these questions have the same answer.
Credibility.
Able to create credibility is one of the main components to sleeping with a girl quickly.
There are men that think they don't have enough value, most of their problem is the credibility they lack. Now a days most of the techniques they used to create value ends up only to make a nasty woman-repelling player vibe. (and anyone who's anyone KNOWS I don't even teach value. Not for a -bleep- second!)
"Player vibe" is a mistake in building and maintaining credibility.
The other component is sexual tension.
And as a good student of pick-up, you know that some women need sexual tension before sleeping with a guy and the other half need credibility first. (You do know that, right?)
So let's get down to it:
There are three levels of credibility.
1. Safety ----The most basic level of credibility, you are to demonstrate SAFETY before a woman will be alone with you and sleep with you
2. Commonality ---- You are to demonstrate commonality in order for a woman to continue sleeping with you, or have a relationship with you.
3. Direction ---- You need to show direction in order to get a woman to leave her current boyfriend or change her existing life plans to be with you.
A WORD ABOUT SOCIAL PROGRAMMING ->
Every person we meet is socially programmed in a different way. Even you yourself have your own social programming. We all do.
Having that differences is not that bad. On the contrary, it's very useful.
Realize that although we understand a lot of a woman's behaviors come from her social programming, we can't expect her to realize that.
We all know that men have evolved an instinct to try to sleep with as many women as possible, while women have evolved an instinct to choose guys who demonstrate a high chance of sticking around to raise children.
And this instinct is reinforced by social programming.
Her programming is her reality and literally her world.
And credibility is about showing you understand her world.
HERE'S AN EXAMPLE ->
Think about that you were in your bedroom. Comfortably warm sitting in a chair.
And then a guy came in. Telling you he was cold. And wanted to turn up the heat. Then he told you he liked the couch you were sitting in. And asked if he could urinate in the corner.
You would feel pretty uncomfortable with him and might even think he's crazy.
He's showing you that he's not seeing the same reality as you. Because he has shown you that he doesn't understand your world, and doesn't respect your world. He's "in his own world".
You probably wouldn't connect with him, or feel like giving him compliance.
This is how women feel when you don't demonstrate credibility.
If she thinks that it's a bad thing for a guy (or even some women do) to kiss and tell, then you should show her you ALSO believe it's bad for people to kiss and tell.
The fact that you have the same perceptions about the world as her will build your credibility immensely.
You can think of the three levels in this way:
Safety - It's safe to have you in her world.
Commonality - You see the same things in her world. (Similar perceptions, values, and goals)
Direction - You have the ability to rearrange and alter her world.
These are best demonstrated in order.
Guys are usually good at meeting a certain kind of woman.
It's because he naturally understands a certain type of worldview.
But as you get good, you'll start to be able to match ANY woman's worldview.
The best way of doing this is by anticipating her thoughts and verbalizing her feelings or views about the world, as if they are your own.
What you will do is try to remember things she's telling you, and then repeat it after she has forgotten it.
Then you will get good at pacing her reality and leading. Eventually it gets to the point where you can intuitively understand her reality. Then she will trust you to change it for her. You enter her world, and then start teaching her new things about HER world.
When someone comes along who understands a woman's reality so well, she doesn't just think he's perceptive and skilled, she just feels a connection.
She thinks "He's just like me!"
This is really the easiest thing in the world. Yet so many people mess it up.
But you can get really good once you know this thing.
It's a major piece and you'll see your game improve dramatically.
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